Don't feel like you have to make this much broccoli. Three pounds is a lot. But it's really good... but if you're not as broccoli-crazed as me, go halfsies.
3 pounds of broccoli
1/4 cup olive oil
12 garlic cloves, about a full head, finely chopped
2 pinches red pepper flakes
1 1/2 teaspoon sea salt
1 1/2 cup water or broth
1. Cut the heads off the broccoli stalks with a couple inches of stalk attached, roughly cutting the broccoli stalk in half widthwise. Cut the head into individual florets, set aside in one bowl. With the thick stalks, peel them, then slice into strips about 1/4 inch think and 1/2 inch wide, set aside in another bowl.
2. Heat the olive oil in a large Dutch oven or stock pot over medium heat. Add the garlic and red pepper flakes, stirring occasionally until the garlic is lightly browned.
3. Add the stems and water, cover, and cook for about 25 minutes.
4. Add the florets, cover, and cook for about 1 1/2 - 2 hours, stirring occasionally. You can stir vigorously if you'd like it to break down more. If you like the texture, but you've got some broth still in the pot, just turn the heat up a bit and leave uncovered until it's mostly evaporated. Season to taste with additional salt and pepper.
If you wanna get really crazy, add in some butter. Holy.crap.